Belly Thoughts.....

Earlier today I visited the blog of an artist I admire who is pregnant with her first child. She is a photographer in addition to her other talents, and often posts gorgeous and engaging photographs; today she posted a picture of herself in the mirror with her shirt hitched up over her belly. I have not had the guts to do that with my first pregnancy nor this one, let alone post it on the web (fear not, good friends!)! She is someone who has also struggled with body image, and she wrote how surprised she was to see how big she looks in the photo.

As I commented on her blog, I think that partly why pregnancy pushes my body image buttons is that it doesn't allow me body anonymity! By that I mean, knowing that I am no 6-foot model, most of my life I've just hoped people will just kind of accept what I look like without saying much (partly because I assume that what they'd have to say wouldn't be kind). And with pregnancy, that just doesn't happen: Your belly just gets to be so obvious, and a reasonable weight gain is actually an important part of health during pregnancy. You just get Big. And Bigger. And you need more room to maneuver around!

Please don't get me wrong - it's not that the pregnancy is not desired - I am VERY happy to be having a second child! But for some reason, this pregnancy has been more challenging for me in accepting what my body looks like. And there is something about a pregnant woman's belly that somehow invites people to make comments like, "Wow, you are REALLY showing!" "You're only "x" months along?" Or touching the belly is another thing - even rubbing it like a crystal ball!

It has been pretty liberating for me to be direct - even if I make it sound like I'm laughing a bit - and reply, "Now, you know you really shouldn't ever say something like that to a woman - pregnant or not!" Or, "Actually, I'm really not comfortable with people touching my belly, but thanks for wanting to be encouraging. Did I tell you we're having a girl?" And then sometimes, all I can do in response is just blink alot in shock and my mind goes blank!

I'm so grateful that the pregnancy journey is so worth it in the end; and, especially with a little girl on the way, it's a good reminder to me that we women struggle so much with poor self-image. I long to pass on to our daughter a strong sense of self rather than a sense of beauty defined by what other people think.

I want to tell more women - strangers and friends alike - that they are BEAUTIFUL. I don't want to just compliment women on their clothes - I want to remind them that they themselves, not their outer trappings, are Fearfully and Wonderfully Made! And you, Friend, who are reading this, please remind yourself that this is true for you. I'm thinking of you as I write this. And I know I need to hear it, too.